From the festa de debutantes of Brazil to the Jewish bat mitzvah, passage from girlhood to adulthood is a cause for celebration in cultures and countries around the world.
For many Latino families, that celebration is the quinceañera, a traditional and often religious rite of passage that takes place when a girl turns 15. Quinceañera also refers to the celebrant herself.
With its show-stopping dresses, rollicking parties, and fabulous cakes, in some ways, a quinceañera is similar to a wedding reception. However, the quinceañera has its own unique traditions and rituals as well.
Here, we take a look at some of those elements and offer some tips for successfully organizing a meaningful and memory-making event.
The elements:
A Catholic mass. Most Catholic churches will be able to accommodate a quinceañera ceremony, but if you have a home church you regularly attend it might be special to hold your ceremony there if you can.
The presentation of the gifts. We’re not talking about the gift-giving that might take place at a wedding or birthday party: This presentation is part of the quinceañera ceremony. The honoree chooses her godparents, an important family member, or another special person in her life to present her with gifts, which often include a Bible, flowers, jewelry, a rosary, or another meaningful religious item.
The waltz. A dance between the young lady and her father, this special moment is an important part of the reception ritual. It symbolizes the girl’s transition into adulthood and, once it’s concluded, is her first chance to dance with other young men. This dance can also extend to the members of the quinceañera’s court, composed of 14 young men and ladies, all friends of the guest of honor.
The rose ceremony. This special element includes three roses that are presented to the quinceañera. Each flower is in different stages of blooming, including a rosebud, a half-opened rose, and one in full bloom. The young lady’s mother will present the rosebud to symbolize childhood and innocence. The half bloom will come from the quinceañera’s godmother or grandmother, and it is meant to remind the girl of the importance of discerning right from wrong. The full bloom is presented by an older female relative to symbolize the fleeting beauty of youth and the importance of the soul.
The changing of shoes. This honor is reserved for the young lady’s father or another close male relative. He will replace her flat shoes with high heels, another nod to her passage to womanhood.
The brindis. This is a toast offered by the guests to the quinceañera, conveying congratulations and well wishes for the future.
The last doll. Yet another marker of a young girl’s journey to adulthood, the quinceañera is presented with a keepsake doll, often dressed like her. This is to be the last of her childhood things, which she is to leave behind as she enters a new stage of her life. In keeping with tradition, the doll can be passed to a younger sibling.
Tips for success:
Budget carefully. Figure out how much you can spend before you start considering venues, caterers, gifts, photographers, and other expenses. As you’re compiling your budget, keep in mind that a quinceañera calls for as many as three dress changes: outfits for the ceremony, the party, and in some cases, specifically for the dance. And that’s not even getting into accessories including tiaras and sashes.
Consider save-the-dates. In today’s busy world, your guests will appreciate as much advance notice as possible. A good rule of thumb is to send them six to nine months in advance.
Ask about your rescheduling options. In the COVID-19 era, it’s worthwhile to find out if your venue, and any other businesses you’ll be working with, will allow you to cancel or reschedule, if necessary, without losing your deposits.
Communicate carefully with potential members of the court. Like members of a wedding party, the friends who comprise the quinceañera court will have specific responsibilities they should be aware of before committing to participate. Court members, in general, attend dance rehearsals, dress formally (often in a ball gown or tuxedo or similarly fancy attire), attend the mass, are available for video shoots and photoshoots, and in some cases, help put together a surprise performance for the guest of honor.
For many teenage girls of Latin American heritage, their quinceañera is one of the most important days of their lives. Steeped in tradition, religion, and a whole lot of fun, a quinceañera marks a major turning point in a girl’s life, and your planning should reflect that importance.
Including the traditional elements is what makes a quinceañera special, so be sure to keep with your culture and help your daughter celebrate the next stage of her life like the generations of women before her.